little bitty girl

My brother Ken's birthday, is a day before mine. When he was turning six, my mother missed his birthday party to give birth to me. Story has it that she had told him that she had a very special "present" for him when she came home. As the neighbourhood kids gathered around my crib, to admire the special "present", Ken supposedly peeked in, wrinkled his nose in disgust and said, "That's it?"

However, he still thinks that since I was technically his sixth birthday present that I am his personal slave for life. He doesn't quite understand why I never jump to do his bidding. Ken is, in not so many words, one of the most self absorbed people you will know.

That is, only if you don't know him very well. To those who are fortunate enough to know him; he is outrageously funny with his frankness, he can find humour in any situation, he is highly intelligent and curious, he's game for any adventure, and he hides the kindest heart underneath his "I don't give a shit about you" persona.

Growing up, we were never very close with him being so much older. After all, how could a six year old child ever relate to her grown up brother of twelve? Over the years though, I have been fortunate enough to make up for lost time and count him as one of my closest of friends. When things just fall apart and every one scrambles to find sympathetic words, Kenny will invariably be the voice of reason.

"You can't control things beyond your control."

"I see stupid people. They're everywhere." (said with a whisper a la The Sixth Sense)

"What did you really expect?"

"NEXT!"

I realize now that he has been teaching me all these important life lessons since I was a little girl. One of my fondest memories was when he was teaching me how to ride a two wheeler. He had enough of the training wheels and just took them off, put me on the bike, held the seat and told me to pedal. I crashed into the fence.

"Right......" he said, as he looked at me thoughtfully "I forgot to teach you how to brake."

And that is just how he was and always is - pragmatic to the bone. After many crashes, and stern warnings of "Don't you dare cry! You want to follow us around on a bike? This is the only way you'll learn..." I was wheelin' with the older neighbourhood kids. Oh yeah!

Kenny has taught me that I am in control of my own destiny, that I can be anything I want to be, and that nothing worth achieving is without its various pitfalls. But at the end of the day, he will always be my Koko (big brother) and he will be there to pick me up, and tell me to try again.

Happy Birthday, Ken!