little bitty girl

Dear Husband,

I am not sure you realize this, but at some point, in the very near future, you will be coming home. I highly suggest that you try to call me very soon and do the following to avoid being in that very bad place that I assure you; you don't want to be in. This bad place is also called the doghouse. This is what I suggest:

(a) Proclaim your undying love

(b) Tell me you've bought fabulous paper/stationary/home accessories from the various stores that I sourced for you

I have not heard from you for almost 5 days other than your cryptic emails about needing some password for some account, possibly coming home a day early (what does 1 day do anyway?) and wanting a picture of me and Mindy. I am not sure how you expected me to take a one handed picture of myself as you have taken our point and shoot camera. Which is also a very sore point with me, as you have mentioned that you have taken very little pictures with it.

I am not worried. I know you are alive since you somehow manage to find the time to change your status on Facebook and add new friends. The only way I've been able to hear your voice is by listening to this radio interview, where I was forced to listen to a lot of footy mumbo jumbo before actually hearing your voice. As you might be able to tell, I am not pleased.

However, here is a picture of your precious Mindy.

View image

In case you are wondering, yes that is a picture of her sitting in "your" chair. The one that you hate her sitting on and you guys fight about every morning. She's been sleeping in it every day, on her back, with her one paw over her eye, getting her hair over all your dark clothes. I just thought you would like to know.

Sincerely yours,

Your Wife